Wanted: Paper Grader

Applicants must have a comprehensive grasp on English grammar, punctuation, and writing styles, as well as an intuitive ability of when to grade the heck out of a paper and when to be a kind, loving soul who says, "E for Effort...way to go." 

Apply via email. Include references. I pay in M&Ms and Hershey kisses.

Unfortunately I'm not serious about this job offer (but, really, if you're interested, let me know), but after falling asleep on the couch not even halfway through a stack of ungraded papers, I'm realizing that while I'm fine during the school day as long as I'm wearing comfortable shoes, by the time Saturday rolls around, there is nothing I want more than to relax. 

Here's the latest update on things:
- I had my first "mommy/teacher" moment where I got a new student moved from another team due to some medical issues of which I won't go into detail.  I have to admit, when I found out I was getting another student on top of my already record-large classes, I was annoyed. Then mad at whoever made the decision to move her to my team. Then mad at myself for being so selfish. And then came the mom thought: if this was my child, I would want her to have an English teacher that loved her and gave her attention and everything she needed to be successful despite the fact that she has 177 other students.  So I took a deep breath, smiled, and put together a packet of information for her, even though I was silently cursing the financial state of most public schools.

- Meanwhile, I have been unsuccessful at talking myself out of being annoyed with a teacher nearby, who frequently makes comments like "I mean, every time we see you, you're eating!"  Yeah, no kidding, lady...Mama needs to gain some weight, thankyouverymuch. 

- 10 days until we find out whether our little one is a boy or a girl!  I'm considering starting a pool to guess baby's gender and birthday, where half of the money goes to the winner and half goes to the baby's college fund. :) Just kidding. (Or am I?)

- I have gained some weight- 6 pounds at my last doctor's appointment, which is a big deal considering I lost a little at the start due to morning sickness.

- Speaking of morning sickness, it seems to have almost entirely passed, down to once or twice a week instead of once or twice a day. Everyone please knock on wood and cross your fingers as you are reading this.

- The bump is ever-growing. Pictures to come soon.  I think it's cute most of the time, but when I'm sitting on the counter half-dressed and drying my hair in the morning (yes, picture that...), I feel like some Amazonian tribal woman that one might see on the Discovery channel.

- I think - maybe - I'm starting to feel little movements and kicks.  I always second guess myself and wonder if it's just all the extra fiber I've been eating moving things around in there.  Ryan can't feel anything from the outside, yet, but I know he will be so excited when he does.